Wars Uuuuuuuup. Ahem.
Blah blah… spoiler alert… blah blah…
SO ANOTHER jolly night of Robot fighting as we get closer to the Robot Wars final.
Kicking off with a former Greenpeace president who uses old beer kegs (some of which that still have beer in them, to make a Clusterbot called “The Kegs”.
[takes a deep breath] CLUSTER BOTS DON’T WORK!!! HOW MANY TIMES?
Tauron was designed by a games tester who believed his knowledge of gaming strategy would help.
[takes a deep breath] THINKING THAT SOMETHING GIVES YOU THE EDGE DOESN’T. APOLLO WAS MADE BY PONTINS BLUECOATS FFS!
Iron-Awe 6 is one of the original Robot Wars teams, with 17 years experience that is now being passed to a third generation
[takes a deep breath] EXPERIENCE MEANS NOTHING AS WE FOUND OUT LAST WEEK WHEN MONEY BEAT EXPERIENCE HANDS DOWN
Concussion a Drum Spinner is captained by Tim who always gets something when he wants it. They went from newbs to semi-finalists last series and are feeling cocky.
[takes a deep breath] PRIDE COMES BEFORE A FALL
Androne 4000 has a big crushing stabby thing on it
[takes a deep breath] CRUSHERS ARE ONLY SLIGHTLY BETTER THAN CLUSTERBOTS… AGGGGGH!
And then there’s Nuts 2. Now Nuts are largely seen as a joke robot with very little chance of doing anything more than entertaining.
[takes a deep breath] …
Oh. Crap. They won.
Yes, with all the predictability of a Brexit vote of a Trump election, or for the more seriously minded, Boaty-McBoatface, the joke option triumphed, and the new rule about entanglement devices being a thoroughly marvellous thing proved that if you spin around a lot and don’t let anyone else too near you, you’re going to win.
But long story short, there was very little fog, there was very little action from the House Robots, and weirdest of all, the undoing against Nuts 2 came because Concussion’s “Nuts Guard” devices stopped their wheels from turning properly once they were flipped. They were supposed to be sacrificial and to fall off easily. But they were too firmly attached.
The question is would Iron Awe have had more luck if it its Flipper which, for our money, is the most successful robot type, had actually been able to flip? We’ll never know. µ
Source : Inquirer